I'm hoping someone might be able to help me identify and locate a relic of the old internet! I discovered a website around 2001-02, when I was 13 or 14... it was lengthy memoir written by a man who identified as straight, but spent most of his preteen/teenage years experimenting sexually with other boys. When I say it was lengthy, I mean, it had dozens of pages, and a detailed timeline that indicated when everything happened.
The reason I'm hoping someone here might know about it is because this guy was also a swimmer, and he dedicated at least one chapter of this memoir to discussing what speedos were like back in (I think?) the 1970s. Speedos played a pretty significant role in at least a few stories, where he talks about how the fit/material interacted with the boners he got. There might even have been a picture of some swimmers from that era, though I can't entirely remember.
A few more details that hopefully will spark the memory:
- The last of the author's same-sex encounters happens when he loses his virginity to a male friend (possibly in a barn?), at which point he for some reason goes straight.
- In the introduction to the memoir, he explicitly states that those who are reading it, hoping it will be pornographic, will be disappointed, because it is descriptive with regard to characters and situations.
- the page had a pale blue background, and I think it was an angelfire site or something in that vein. (like I said, this was old internet.)
I'm basically outgoing and make friends easily, and people tell me I'm a nice guy. Those people have obviously never seen me before my first cup of coffee in the morning, however.